The Spanish Economy – an idiot’s view….

“The Euro casts a shadow over Spain……can you see what I did there?”

It had to happen, my take on why the Spanish economy (and everybody else’s) has gone totally and utterly tits up.  I know its more Bananarama than Panorama, but hell, everybody has an opinion, and here’s mine….Just click on the player to hear this BayRadio rant from a couple of weeks ago in its entirety. Don’t forget, you can also listen live to Bay Radio by clicking on the appropriate icon. My next live broadcast will be around 2130 CET on The Sunset Strip with Noelle on Friday night, repeated Sunday lunchtime on The Sunday Brunch. This week, I attack Pigeons. Never let it be said that I shy away from a broad remit.

Kev Moore

Leafblowers – Wind from the Devil’s anus

“I’m doing my bit for the environment…” “what?? I can’t hear you?”….”I said, I’M DOING MY BIT FOR THE ENVIRONMENT!!!” A leafblower recently, failing to grasp the supreme irony.

Here’s an extract from my recent Friday night Bay Radio rant about Leafblowers:

“…Who the hell ever decided leaf-blowers were a good idea?  I mean, I get the need for inventors. You have folks around you dying of cancer and stuff, you feel the need to try and invent a cure, or  you can’t figure out how to get a screw to stay in a brick wall, so you invent a rawplug to help it stay there. You’re fed up with walking, or feeding the horse, you invent the car. I get it.

But a leaf blower???? In the name of all that’s holy – why???? ……”

(To hear the rest of this rant, click on the player below)

You can listen to me every Friday on the sunset Strip with Noelle, around 9.30pm CET, and on The Sunday Brunch, with Bob and Noelle, around midday CET

To listen to Bay Radio live, just click on the icon below.

Kev Moore

Carry on Camping? No bloody thanks!

“Hello, I have a gun….”

• Last week’s rant saw me take on the great outdoors, or, more specifically the mystifying need for people to ‘rough it’. Camping – what’s it for? Well, I don’t bloody know to be honest, but I try and grapple with the question all the same.
•  Hear me carry on about camping on
• my Friday rant slot, reproduced on the player below for your delight:

You can also listen live to Bayradio by clicking on the listen live icon below. I appear on The Sunset Strip with Noelle every Friday night around 9.30 pm CET, and it’s repeated every Sunday around 1..30pm CET on The Sunday Brunch with Bob and Noelle. But if, heaven forbid, you miss them, you can always check in here to listen again. This Friday, may 18th, I tackle Leafblowers. You heard it hear first.

Kev Moore

Spanish build Quality

A balcony only Spider-man could love.....

I bet you never thought you’d see ‘Spanish’ and ‘Quality’ in the same sentence. Except perhaps when talking about football. Anyway, don’t worry, because it’s LACK of quality I’m railing against on my rant from the weekend . Just Click on the player at the foot of this post to hear it.  You can also listen live to Bayradio by clicking on the listen live icon below. I appear on The Sunset Strip with Noelle every Friday night around 9.30 pm CET, and it’s repeated every Sunday around 1..30am CET on The Sunday Brunch with Bob and Noelle. But if, heaven forbid, you miss them, you can always check in here to listen again.

Kev Moore

 

The Chinese Birth Control Policy

Only one of these kids is legal. Probably.

The Chinese. Again. this time it’s to take a closer look at their birth control policy and what unforseen effects its having on the land of illegally copied goods.  Ironic really. They stop you reproducing kids, but reproduce a designer handbag, or a car, and you can knock yourself out, mate – make a million of ’em! So take a listen to my rant from the weekend where I have a go at our epicanthically-folded friends!  There’s also a song “Just one more”. Just Click on the player at the foot of this post.  You can also listen live to Bayradio by clicking on the listen live icon below. I appear on The Sunset Strip with Noelle every Friday night around 9.30 pm CET, and it’s repeated every Sunday around 1..30am CET on The Sunday Brunch with Bob and Noelle. But if, heaven forbid, you miss them, you can always check in here to listen again.

Kev Moore

Last weeks Friday Rant

If you missed last week’s Friday rant on Bay Radio (9.30pm CET, every Friday on The Sunset strip with Noelle) fear not, errant and tardy listener, you can check it out here! Just click on the player below to be subjected to “My Bottom 10” – a personal trawl through the bottom of the barrel of musical misdemeanours. To listen live to BayRadio, broadcasting all along the Spanish costas from Valencia down to Almeria, just click on the LISTEN LIVE icon.

On the air tonight, appropriately enough, as I’m about to wing my way back to the UK for a show with my band BC SWEET, I shall be ‘discussing’ Airline Etiquette, and the fact that there isn’t any. Enjoy!

Kev Moore

The Unbearable wrongness of Swimming

BEWARE: People like this could be in YOUR pool.....

So, there I was. I go there every day. The swimming pool. Sanctuary for the soul. It’s calm waters soothing me as the Spanish sunlight gentle kisses the barely unruffled surface. Mostly.

I can deal with the classes of stupidly loud children, because they are usually shepherded out prior to them drowning themselves. I also have a pet nutter, who unfortunately contrives to get changed exactly when I do, and, following a total mis-communication about my body lotion some weeks back, has taken to calling me ‘Mr. Chocolate’ – often when others are in the changing room, which could lead to potentially embarrassing situations. Or death.  I tried to ignore him, but one day made the mistake of talking to an English guy (the nutter is Spanish) and he proceeded to speak incredibly loudly, stamping his feet and clapping his hands. He was like an entire Salvation Army band on speed. It seems then that Spain has opted for care in the community…..

Anyway, he’s calmed down a little of late, and I now lock myself in the disabled shower room and get showered, dried and dressed before making a beeline for the exit, and thereby managing to avoid eye-contact.  But onward to my gripe.

Today, I was happily swimming away in the only free lane, languidly scooping the water aside with my hugely impressive breast-stroke stylee, when an older lady had the temerity to enter the water and begin to use MY LANE AT THE SAME TIME!!!!  What kind of bare-faced intimidation was this? I asked myself (but only in my head, fearful of swallowing a huge amount of water in which 50 small children had recently been rinsed.)

Now, being a fair-minded sort of individual, I gave this person the benefit of the doubt, as there were no completely free lanes, but as she entered the water, the lane next to me in which one of the lifeguards appeared to have been torturing several young boys by making them retrieve rubber hoops from the pool bottom time and again, suddenly became free.  It remained free, as the elderly lady made her way down my lane. I swam a further three lengths with my ill-matched and unwanted partner, giving her the chance to move her arse next door. She did not do so. The temerity!

There was I, totally outstripping this flounderer in the twilight of their lives, and I  had to make the lane change for fear of becoming lost in a tangle of underwater wrinkles. How can this be?  Why do these people need a full-length pool anyway? By the time they get to the other end, we’ve put the clocks back.  On the other side of the pool, a lifeguard-ess, barely out of secondary school is making more old women move incredibly slowly underwater to the beat of music they plainly detest. (In fairness, so do I)

The thing is, these women never change. they stay fat, they stay old, and they don’t appear to get any fitter, so what is it all for? Are they pretending they’re in outer space? I’ll contribute to re-introducing the space shuttle to put them there. then they can swim to their hearts content.

Kev Moore